this is a love letter's irreparable damage [bing|bang|boom]
this is a love letter

[ inhale | carbon monoxide ]
[ exhale | carbon dioxide ]

i haven't done this in a while [03 october 2004|03:27pm]
[ mood | bored ]

1) Using band names, spell out your name.


J-Jets to Brazil
O-Old 97's
N-New Order
A-The Automatics
H-Hot Snakes
A-Adams, Ryan (?)
N-New York Dolls

2) Have you ever had a song written about you? no

3) What song makes you cry? "needle in the hay" elliot smith

4) What song makes you happy? "middle" rocket from the crypt

5) HEIGHT: 5'11"

6) HAIR COLOR: brown

7) EYE COLOR: brown


7) TATTOOS: nil

8) WHAT YOU WEARING?: old school hook-ups shirt and boxers

9) WHAT SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO?: "hell" squirrel nut zippers



12) HOW ARE YOU?: great


14) HAVE A BAD HABIT?: smoking


16) LIKE TO DRIVE?: it's a fucking chore

17) BOYFRIEND?: no

18) GIRLFRIEND?: yes

19) CHILDREN?: no


21) BEEN HURT?: yes

22) YOUR GREATEST REGRET?: fuck regret

23) YOUR CD PLAYER HAS IN IT RIGHT NOW?: elliott smith



26) WHAT'S THE NEXT CD YOU'RE GONNA GET?: the doors - greatest hits

Seven things in your room:
1) collage
2) bed
3) litter box
4) tv
5) 2 guitars
6) alarm clock
7) dresser

Top seven things you say most:
1) fuck
2) the
3) a
4) i
5) it
6) huh
7) no

Do You:
Smoke?: yes
Do drugs?: no
Read the newspaper?: sometimes
Pray?: no
Have a Job: yeah, 2
Attend Church: no

Have you ever:
Been in love?: yes
Gone skinny dipping?: yes
Had a medical emergency?: yes
Had surgery?: no
Swam in the dark?: yes
Been to a Bonfire?: no
ran away from home?: no
Played strip poker?: yes
Been on stage?: yes
Slept outdoors?: yes
Pulled an all nighter?: yes
Been on radio/tv?: yes
Been in a mosh-pit?: yes
Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?: yes
Describe your first kiss?: rape

Wallet?: black leather
Coffee?: lotsa cream lotsa sugar
Cologne/Perfume: boss in motion and fcuk his

In the last 24 Hours have you....:
Cried: no
Bought something: cigarettes and a paper and groceries
Gotten sick: no
Sang: in the shower
Been kissed: yes
Felt stupid: no
Talked to an ex: no
Talked to someone you have a crush on: no need for a crush
Missed someone: i don't see chris enough
Hugged someone: yes

1 bullet through my head + load the gun

where do i go? [25 april 2004|04:45am]
[ mood | complacent ]

i don't know why i don't ever post. i should do it way more often that i do. i'm way too busy i guess. so anyways tomorrow is game 2 of the philly-toronto series (hockey owns). i hope philly wins, i'll be watching it at 6. so anyone that misses me at all can just turn on the game and maybe you can get into my psyche a little. and maybe we'll be a bit closer. so i'm listening to elliott smith, and this has to be the most depressing music ever made. anyone who doesn't know, he's dead now. it was supposedly a suicide but he was stabbed twice in the heart. and his name was spelled wrong in the sucide note, so now they don't think its suicide. anyways i never can think of anything to write when i post. so whatever ciao.

5 bullets through my head + load the gun

eazy motherfucking e [07 february 2004|01:16am]
[ mood | groggy ]

i have no idea what that subject has to do with the post. i have no idea what this post is going to be about. the words that flow from my fingertips i cannot control. it just happens, and when it happens, its amazing. so anyways i'm so going to see against me! i missed em a couple of months ago because i hate anti-flag, i think justin sane is the punk rock equivalent of justin timberlake. but against me! fucking rocks and i can't wait to see them. i need to call ricky and see if he'll go. my life is still boring. boring, boring, boring. i need to go back to school. i need to learn. my job is causing my brain to hemmorhage. if any of you have DirecTV and call in to talk to customer service, stop being fucking morons. okay enough venting for now. i'm tired.ciao.

2 bullets through my head + load the gun

i hate passwords [03 february 2004|10:42pm]
[ mood | apathetic ]

i keep forgetting the damn password, thats why i never update.
and i really don't have much to say about my life.
it's boring.
so much for self social commentary.
i'm a boring person.
at least when i'm by myself writing about myself.
i should stick to writing stories.
stories not about me.
it's hard to tell that i've been published before.
but they were just poems.
poems are the shit of literature.
i used to like writing them.
now i realize how pointless and monotonous they are.
it's like everyone read the same poem and used a thesaurus.
kind of ironic.
this post is written much like a poem.
ginsberg was good.
but that's more like prose.
anyone can write like anyone.
be angry, be happy, just grab a thesaurus and you too could be the next thoreau.
it's fucking ridicuolus.
i like novels now.
poems are for the readers with add.
i hope i offended you if you have add.
you'll get over it.
take your behavioral problems and poor social skills somewhere else.
pop your ritalin, adderal, wellbutrin, and clonodine.
and sit down.
ok now i'm rambling.
i'll stop now

2 bullets through my head + load the gun

it's been a while (no not that shitty staind song) [13 november 2003|02:07am]
[ mood | awake ]

man i haven't done this in a while. so i don't know what to say, let's catch up. i so far in the 21 years of my existence have managed to accomplish absolutely nothing while most of my friends are about to graduate with a degree of some sort. while me the three time college dropout seems to just keep fucking up in one way or another. but i have a job, thank god. i work for directv (convergys for you okies). it's a shit job and i hate it. anyone knowing of any decent job offerings that pay more than 8 bucks an hour hit me up please, cause i hate my job. which it seems now i have to go to bed (play tony hawk underground) so i can get up for work in the morning. but i'll be back.ciao.

3 bullets through my head + load the gun

too bad legends have to die [23 december 2002|07:14pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

joe strummer 1952-2002.

"Mon Dec 23,10:39 AM ET, LONDON (Reuters) - Joe Strummer, frontman with the Clash whose 1979 track "London Calling" exploded as one of punk's biggest anthems, has died at the age of 50, a spokesman said on Monday.

The singer, guitarist and songwriter died on Sunday at his home in Somerset, western England of unknown causes.

"We do not yet know the cause of death, but we believe it was not suspicious and that he passed away peacefully. An autopsy will be forthcoming," the spokesman said.

Born John Graham Mellor in Ankara, Turkey, Strummer's talents propelled him from playing for change on the London Underground to fame with the Clash, who with the Sex Pistols defined the in-your-face sound and style of 1970s British punk.

Until they split in the 1980s, the Clash produced a catalog of punk classics, including "Career Opportunities" and "Should I Stay or Should I Go?," distilling the depression, anger and energy of 1970s Britain.

But they transcended the three-chord aggression to deliver messages of anti-racism and social consciousness. Strummer, the son of a British diplomat, wrote many of their biggest hits.

"He was one of the most important figures in modern British music, a powerful performer and wordsmith on a level with Bob Dylan (news)," said Pat Gilbert, editor of British music magazine Mojo

"His music had compassion and vision, backed with an agenda to change the world for the better," he told Reuters.

Sometimes described as rebels with a cause, the Clash fused a variety of musical styles -- reggae, funk and even rap -- with a political message that brought punk to the mainstream and also found big success in the U.S. market.

Bono, lead singer from the Irish band U2, said: "The Clash was the greatest rock band. They wrote the rule book for U2."

In 1976, Strummer met a then 23-year-old guitarist Mick Jones and linked up with bassist Paul Simonon and drummer Terry Chimes. As the Clash, the quartet made an immediate and explosive impact in Britain.

Rolling Stone magazine called their 1977 eponymous debut "The definitive punk album."

Follow-ups "Give 'Em Enough Rope" (1978), and "London Calling" (1979) also became instant punk classics. After The Clash split, a tireless Strummer stayed center stage with a variety of projects, dabbling in acting and writing music for films.

More recently, Strummer toured with a new band, the Mescaleros, and played a benefit concert with Mick Jones in November, reuniting with his partner in punk for the first time in nearly 20 years.

At the time of his death, Strummer was collaborating with U2's Bono and Dave Stewart (news), formerly of the Eurythmics, on an AIDS (news - web sites) awareness track.

"The Clash are to be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame next year and there was hope that there would be a reunion and a tour...this must be especially sad for their fans," Gilbert said.

Strummer's death was a double blow for punk fans still mourning the fatal drug overdose in June of singer Dee Dee Ramone from legendary American band the Ramones.

Strummer is survived by his wife, two daughters and one stepdaughter."

life is so precious.
merry fucking christmas.

1 bullet through my head + load the gun

[01 december 2002|10:41pm]
[ mood | hxc as fuck ]

whats my scene?

brought to you by Quizilla

1 bullet through my head + load the gun

god damn the day after thanksgiving [29 november 2002|12:16am]
[ mood | bitchy ]

well everyone it seems in 4 hours and 10 minutes i start my 12 hour shift from hell at a toy store at the mall. someone come say hi. i'm working at penn square at kaybee in the action figures aisle. and if i don't make it out alive, i will miss you all. well i'll update later. till then. adieu

load the gun

god damn the day after thanksgiving [29 november 2002|12:16am]
[ mood | bitchy ]

well everyone it seems in 4 hours and 10 minutes i start my 12 hour shift from hell at a toy store at the mall. someone come say hi. i'm working at penn square at kaybee in the action figures aisle. and if i don't make it out alive, i will miss you all. well i'll update later. till then. adieu

2 bullets through my head + load the gun

thats what i'm talkin bout. [28 november 2002|11:49am]
[ mood | thanksgivingy ]

How scene are you?!

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i knew it, now whats wrong with this picture.
Which RioT GrrrL Band are You?

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ash will be so proud of me.
What New Jersey band are you?

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hell yeah, quiz day is a good day.

What kind of punk kid are you?

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damn straight.
Which Indie Guitar Guy Are You?

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yeah i hate modest mouse.

load the gun

alas, till another day [27 november 2002|12:07am]
[ mood | apathetic ]

i never update anymore, all i do is comment. well anyways, at the moment i am unemployed and am looking for part time work so if anyone want to hook a brotha up. but anyways, my life lately has gone to a nice piece of shit. i start back up in school in january, so maybe that will be my uplifting happiness. but anyways thats all for now. adieu

2 bullets through my head + load the gun

viva el mexico [24 november 2002|11:58pm]
[ mood | hXc ]

How WHITE are you?

Brought to you by the good folks at

How MEXICAN are you?

Brought to you by the good folks at

hell yeah i'm 60% mexican. just like it should be.
1 bullet through my head + load the gun

[18 october 2002|08:22pm]
[ mood | bored ]

How can I label you?

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thats right its the good non-whiny, kick you in the ass emo. bastards.

**************What Part of the body are U?*************

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tounge eh? nod nod, wink wink.

!!!!!!!!!Do U need a straight jacket?!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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i could have predicted that outcome.

---What fast food condiment are you?---

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i would have opted for mayo, but hey it better than mustard.

What's Your Bedroom Personality? (For Her)

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i should have expected that, but hey they could have at least asked before using my ass as the picture.

Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?

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yeah, if you're going to have a psychological problem , theres none better to have. i should know, i work with crazy people.

How Emotional Are You?

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hereby completely disproving the jon being emo theory.

which eye are you?

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hereby canceling out the theory just said.

A different quiz, what strange type of person are you?

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perfect for me, the aspiring author, the aspiring musician, the aspiring creative genius that i will be

What Nine Inch Nails song are you?

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ok dammit so i'm emo, is that so wrong.

What kind of porno would you star in?

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great so now i'm an emo kid, and a hopeless romantic, but those pretty much coincide with each other. but anyways, damn these test being so insightful, i think i'll go cry now. adieu

p.s. everyone needs to go see rules of attraction, yeah the stars of it may deter you, but its really good. i'm going to see it for the second time tonight. for god sakes it's adapted from a bret easton ellis novel. and for those of you who that meant gibberish to. two words. american psycho. so anyways yeah bye again.

3 bullets through my head + load the gun

hail to the king baby!!! [05 october 2002|12:27am]
[ mood | apathetic ]

i only have 2 things to say.
one. sorry i haven't updated in a while, mainly this goes to my faithful companions, all 2 of you.
and two. yesterday i met bruce campbell, for those of you who have no idea who i'm talking about. get a fucking life and learn something. he's only the greatest b-movie actor ever, and i got my picture with him. so it'll be up as soon as i get off my lazy ass and scan it. but anyways, i'll start updating more often for sure. sorry everyone. goodnight. adieu

3 bullets through my head + load the gun

jumpin jehosafet [06 september 2002|06:37pm]
[ mood | geeky ]

goin to norman and bringing my absolut.

i think it would be cool if i had a tail
i think it would be cool if i had wings
i think it would be cool if i had claws
i think it would be cool if i had sharp pointy teeth
i think my dream is to someday be a pterodactyl.
i hope it will come true.

1 bullet through my head + load the gun

i had to take these [03 september 2002|01:21am]
[ mood | amused ]

What's Your Movie Dream Car?

by Auto Glass America

fuck yeah that ferrari was bad ass

What Element Are You?

that is so hit the nail on the head, i'm going to cry now.
load the gun

home at last [03 september 2002|01:07am]
[ mood | relieved ]

to all of you getting worried, don't be anymore, i went to el paso for 4 days. i got drunk in mexico and there was an open bar on the last day of the family reunion, im me and i'll tell you more about it. heh, great fun it was. the only thing that sucked was the 15 hour drives to el paso and back. but anyways i'm tired.

load the gun

goodbye papa leo, we miss you already [19 august 2002|02:17am]
[ mood | gloomy ]

so yeah my favorite resident at the nursing home i work at died today. a 70 year old black man who talked about pussy, hunting rabbits, and moonshine. he was the coolest guy there and now he's gone. i guess it kind of comes with the territory, but this one i didn't want to see go. and now it has happened i need to find out when the funeral is so that i may attend. what a great day. tommorow i get to go with chris to find out if he gets expelled from UCO for a little "get-together" we threw on his last day living at the commons. other than that tommorow should be a wondrous and magical day. yeah right, fuck that. adieu

2 bullets through my head + load the gun

original me [16 august 2002|05:41pm]
[ mood | peaceful ]

as of now i am officially off of work for 9 days. 9 fucking days. thank god. i saw the anniversary last night, they were really good, but they only played like 6 songs, i wish they would've played more and shortned modest mouse's set, they were god awful. oh well i think i'm goin to see reverend horton heat tommorow so that should be fun, oh yeah if anyone wants to do anything, just tell me, i've got fucking days off for god sakes. adieu

2 bullets through my head + load the gun

i am matt skiba reincarnated from the future. [13 august 2002|12:57am]
[ mood | artistic ]



Find out which band you are!

1 bullet through my head + load the gun

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